I have a friend named Robert who is too smart for his own good: computer whiz, math team MVP, the guy who can build his own video game from scratch and still have time to ace high school math. That would be Rob. We've been a pair for as long as I can remember, or at least for as long as my family has owned a camera, and on lazy afternoons and evenings, much like today, I basically live on his back porch as he organizes frames for recent animation projects. Yesterday, over lemonade and a game of Uno, he brought up a much debated topic of ours: are our lives controlled by Fate, or by our own actions?
Okay, so it isn't the stuff of a usual conversation between two high school seniors, but I had an answer by way of a couple of anecdotes.
I somehow reached my sophomore year of high school before I ever had to make friends. I met my friends in preschool and kindergarten and by some divine intervention we managed to stay together. Some might call it a blessing - I was never left alone in the cafeteria at school; I always had plans for the weekends. There was no awkward transitioning faze for me. Someone was always there. However appealing this lifestyle might sound, the constant presence of entertainment just made my fifteenth year all the harder. And what happened to me that overturned my set lifestyle? All of my friends got jobs and found boyfriends and suddenly I was alone on my Friday nights.
Okay, so I make it sound more dramatic than it actually was. But I really was in a bad position. I'm a year younger than the rest of my grade at school, so I was the only one who couldn't drive myself places, and my parents weren't too keen on letting me ride in the car with some of my crazy sixteen-year-old friends. That was a very hard year for me. But as I look back on it, I see that divine intervention (that's what I call it) or Fate (what a lot of other people may call it) or even plain old Lady Luck was looking out for me. This realization came one Sunday at youth group. My two "best friends" were skipping church to run off to a diner with their car-racing, wannabe punk boyfriends, and naturally I couldn't go. I sulked a little as I watched them leave through the back door and drive away in their cars. I knew my parents would kill me if I had gone with them, but I couldn't help thinking I was missing out (I wasn't - the girls both got grounded for skipping church).
Suddenly, a girl from my youth group came over to where I was sulking alone and asked if I wanted to sit with her. I knew her a little from choir, and at first was hesitant to give up my depressed slump, but finally I gave in and went to sit with her and her friends. We talked about annoying teachers and our plans for the summer, and during praise and worship we clapped our hands and goofed off and had a much better time than I was used to. Now, almost two years have gone by, and do you know what? Me and that girl are best friends, closer than I ever had been with my old ones.
A simple and girlish point of view on why things happen, but it pretty much defines my views on Fate and divine intervention. Fate (or God in my point of view) gives us what we need and does away with what is hurting us. It's all a manner of waiting and letting things happen. For example, if I had become impatient with my friends and tried to tag along, I would have gotten myself in trouble and risked not meeting one of the best friends I could have asked for. Someone was looking out for me that night, whether it was a divine being or a sort of invisible hand guiding me to make sure I ended up on the right path. Either way, it was a defining point for my beliefs. So trust your instincts, let stuff happen to you, and go with your gut. Some things can't be changed; some things can. But everything will work itself out in time.
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